NO LOVE. Best ways to ruin your Valentine's in Riga.

According to CAPITAL R team Valentine's day is not worth even to own a separate historico-cultural discourse text per se. Yet, as local class haters we, for sure, have things to say. This little post will serve you as a pocket guide - a few tips on this particular day that, according to opinions by our Facebook friend pool, only exists for more profitable masterplans to be fulfilled at shops, restaurants, and movie theatres. Gotta keep this capitalism rollin'!

In this post we have a list of great ways to make your sweetheart blush, and keep the evening "memorable". Or you can simply erase it from the calendar, as 23,5 % men in Latvia think. Do you have any worse suggestions - write them in comments!
animation, gif, broken love, broken heart, capital r, riga, 2019, martins engelis
  • Want to take someone to diner? Try Pelmeņi XL. That stuff will never let you down. Located in the heart of the romantic Old Riga, this mythological dumpling place works longer nights (for your perfect foreplay, mate), plus it does not cost that cheap any more like 5 years ago -  therefore it's exclusive! And also priceless.
  • Board games - they always work on Valentine's, so find your internationally speaking relationship killer at Brain Games store. You can go for such old school classics like Monopoly, or Scrabble for your best ruined relationship, but we rather suggest destroying marriages with something contemporary, say, 7 Wonders: Duel, Santorini or Fog of Love.
  • Buy someone flowers at the Sakta 24h flower market. Then warm up your partner with a story on how this little piece of shit became, probably, the most expensive piece of architecture in Europe, therefore these flowers are damn exclusive. Then finish it off like a king by telling that this 1 million euro hut didn't even have toilets at the opening. The bouquet sellers needed to jump over the green fence opposite the High Court of Latvia (!) to take a dump during nights, for a long time. Hell, yeah, only lovers left alive.
  • The last suggestion is a killer. Technically and practically. Take your date to a real heart dissection at Spiikiisii café organized by the museum of Anatomy. Although there are no spaces left, thus no one can book a space any more, this fact pretty much again proves of Latvians having a pretty macabre sense of humour. Even if you are vegan, admit, this is just dark fun.


We very much yearn for a moment when there will be an Alliance of Unpopular Men founded, or something El Pasonan will take place in Latvia any next year. Imagine, the scorned you will finally be able to feed your ex piece of shit to rodents or whatnot. And no, we are not negative, in fact, we are only here to share love! Our deepest affection and devotion to all anatomists, and macabre sense of humour!
A solid suggestion - most likely your Valentine's day will be best enjoyed when Kalsarikänniting. Google it up, lovers.